Sunday, June 21, 2009

Herpes Doesn't Mean the End of Your Dating Life

By Jayde Johanssen

You have just returned from your doctor's office, and the test results confirm what you already knew: a herpes diagnosis. Take some time to adjust to the thought that you'll carry herpes for the duration of your life, but remember, this certainly isn't anything that will stop you from leading a fulfilling existence. People that carry the herpes virus aren't different from anyone else. really, the only main thing to remember is that you have to be more careful when engaging in sex with a new partner.

First, we'll start with a bit of an introduction. Herpes is a virus that is transmitted when an infected person engages in sexual activity with a partner. It's important to note once more that, at least for the moment, herpes doesn't have a cure, and stays with the host for the rest of his or her life. Sporadically, the virus manifests itself into blisters and sores that can be itchy and irritable.

You're probably wondering what herpes means as it relates to your dating life. The biggest thing is honesty; you'll want to tell your potential partners up front about what the infection is, how it can affect them, and the risks they endure by engaging in sexual activity with them. Of course, you don't have to go through all of this over the first dinner date. The main thing to avoid is having the conversation right before you get into bed for your first time. Talk about a mood killer! The result is usually tears and angry, slammed doors. Avoid this situation by being frank and open early in the relationship.

You may also want to consider looking into dating websites and services that advertise and provide service only to people who already have herpes. There are many benefits to going through this kind of medium: everything is right out there on the table, and you'll never have that potentially awkward moment of explaining herpes to your partner.

Most people who carry the herpes virus only have visible symptoms some of the time. That's not an excuse to keep the fact that you have herpes to yourself, because you can pass it along at any time, regardless of whether there's anything showing or not.

You'll want to avoid having sex while you're suffering from an outbreak, because the chances of transmission to your partner are much greater during this period. Though anti-viral drugs that limit and control outbreaks are quite expensive, you should definitely consider them if you want to limit herpes' effect on your life.

Finally, make sure to always wear a condom or similar protection. While they're certainly not foolproof, they do go far in making sure that you stay safe. Herpes is only one of the STDs you need to worry about, so stay protected.

When everything's said and done, remember that the person you're meant to spend the rest of your life with will love without regard to whether you have herpes or not. This is only one bit of your life, and not something that needs to define you.

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